Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Terrible Day

I am not doing well. Terrible day today. I fell apart big time. I don't want to go over it again. I am finally sitting in a bed at the Embassy Suite and wishing I could stay for a few days.

I have an appointment with my counselor tomorrow and I don't want to go. I want to sleep in late, rest, recuperate.

I will send her a text. I am not sure if she will get it. 

I am going downstairs to get my things in the van. My favorite part of the hotel is how fresh and clean everything is.

Next day.........

Walking up in the hotel today I am so clam. The beautiful crisp white sheets and pillow... I wish I had these at home.

Random thoughts, can't find link or connection.... written down in journal May 29, 2009.

Work - Honesty - Loyalty -Hard Work

Learned the best classroom in the world can be at the feet of the elderly.

Everyone wrote a thanksgiving tribute by writing a nice word or sentiment about each of his or her coworkers.

Lived through the great depression... seen emotional frailties and now values humanness. 

The way of solving problems is to work around it. His mom worked after they lost the farm in the depression... she really wasn't well.

"Always getting in trouble" - exploits, twinkle in eye, sense of humor. spent most of time with people 20-30 years old, therefore priority center was different than most.

Land - not any more - own it  - you are bound to make a profit. 

The optimist fell 20 stories, at each window - he shout to his friends....  "everything is all right so far...."

Stop to think what change means - watch change in people, habits, style, desire, everything. Its happening everyday. Think about it.

The object of my affection is in my reflection - folly bound up in the heart of a child.

Early childhood abandonment and abuse can cause a person to be a narcissist - stuck in self-interest, excessive self-absorption, and feeling extreme entitlement.

How do I help myself get out or not feel trapped?

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