Thursday, April 14, 2011

Happy Days - Simple Times

Sometimes when you live a life after abuse.... you tend to be most emotional about the crud days... and so it tends to be what you write most about.

A benefit of living through trauma is "normal blah ordinary days" can be quite special.
Take Time to Savor Small Joys

Today, for me, is such a day. My sink is full of dishes, my bed still has to be made, I am not even sure I have brushed my hair or teeth... but I have a overwhelming warm glow resonating from inside out... and a very real smile on my face...

What's up? My relationships with my family... and God.

I had a GREAT talk with all of my children together and individually.

My son wanted to learn to fix french toast. So we did that together... he even wanted to get a cookbook out.

It seems we are together more... making attempts to lovingly appreciate little times... but most of all each other.

I love hearing my children talk together.... it helps when mom is not emotionally off-balance.

And I love hearing them express their opinions about ideas, other people's comments, and just anything they are interested... pure joy.

I will savor this moment like a fresh spring blossom... knowing moments, days... like these don't last, but they are real... and in this real moment I will savor it... let it fill me up... let my joy be full.

And maybe on a day that I am down I can reflect, look back on times such as today, as what I love so much about life itself.

That is what makes abuses and childhood trauma so devastating... Relationships are what life is made of.... if the basic ones are destructive, cracked, quicksand, life has in constant tumbling turmoil.

But also it is what makes life so wonderful, when you have invested in rebuilding a foundation, in building from the clean slate, from the steadiness of reality, and after the pain has been chipped away head-on...  you are given a true fresh start.

I sense this is what God is giving me. A time to build. A time to laugh. A time to love. A time to dance. Nothing is perfect but there is a time for everything, every season, under heaven... and it comes to those who are willing to walk through the intensely painful memories keeping steadily fixed with your eyes of your Maker.

Take time to notice.... happy days.

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